70 Greatest Sentences

Esquire has published a list of the 70 greatest sentences from its 75 years of existence.

Most of them are indifferent as sentences, relying on context. One or two would be meh with a volume of context on either side. The very best is one which everyone thinks he knows:

But at three o'clock in the morning, a forgotten package has the same tragic importance as a death sentence, and the cure doesn't work--and in a real dark night of the soul it is always three o'clock in the morning, day after day. -- F. Scott Fitzgerald, "Pasting It Together," 1936

That’s profound. Another favourite is profound and important:

Negroes want to be treated like men: a perfectly straightforward statement, containing only seven words. -- James Baldwin, "Fifth Avenue, Uptown," 1960

And this one has no pretensions, but it does have something a great sentence must have -- a sublime economy:

Ah, Brandy, Misty, and Amanda, come out and sit on the veranda. -- Charles P. Pierce, "Two Strokes Back," 1999

Esquire's 70 Greatest Sentences - Esquire

LIFE: is a minestrone

You could spend decades sifting through the photo archive of Life magazine, which has just been opened up online by Google.

I’ve just picked one for now, of a woman in 1944 mourning the death of her mother in a massacre in her village by the Germans.

LIFE

Butt Bandit caught at last

Image by Getty Images via Daylife

Police have arrested a man suspected of leaving greasy, graphic imprints on the windows of stores, churches and schools in a small Nebraska town. A 35-year-old man was caught in the act by police early Wednesday morning, Cherry County Attorney Eric Scott said Friday. The man hasn't been charged yet, but authorities believe he is the vandal some townsfolk have dubbed the "Butt Bandit’.

Suspect arrested for greasy imprints in Neb. town

 

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Dickipedia

Main Page - Dickipedia - A Wiki of Dicks

Random Recipe Generator

Below is a randomly-generated recipe!

Horseradish Sauce Mille Feuille

Serves 5

You will need:

* 4 oxo cubes

* 2 sheets of ricepaper

* 90ml horseradish sauce

* 60g raisins

Instructions:

1. toast the sheets of ricepaper

2. add one tablespoon of the sheets of ricepaper

3. bring the sheets of ricepaper to the boil

4. defrost the oxo cubes

5. throw the raisins away

6. barbeque the horseradish sauce

7. enjoy

Yum.

Insufficiently delicious? Reload the page for another.

jamesoff.net » Random Recipe Generator

The joke that writes itself

Beavers back in Britain - CNN.com

 

 

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Daniel, born September 11

Daniel was born on September 11, and after the events of that day in 2001, he jokingly complained that his birthday had been ruined forever, because it would always be first and foremost the anniversary of that day.

The problem only came up once, in 2002. Daniel died on 18 November that year, also at the top of a tower-block, when his apartment caught fire. He was 26, and those few days.

It's been six years now, and the hole he left just doesn't get any smaller.

Sprint: Plug into Now.

This totally rocks.

Sprint: Plug into Now.

pixar piss take

A message to all Americans

Image via Wikipedia
Now get off the stage already
All right, enough already, you elected a black man. Can you please take the bouquet, quit bowing and get the fuck off the stage?

Just in case nobody noticed during the apotheosis of the nation that elected Bush twice into the nation that banished all prejudice forever, there are a couple of outstanding issues:

1. Proposition 8 passed in fucking California of all places. So discrimination is not dead, folks. It's not even going down for a count.

2. The death penalty is still exercised in the United States, which ought to be enough to make all right-minded people ashamed of those stars and stripes.

Okay. We're all in love with Obama, too. Imagine having to listen to a man who not only can speak in sentences, but who also has a lovely voice. He's very handsome, as is his wife, and his kids are gorgeous. And his clothes sense is simply to die for, dahling.

But I refer you to point one and point two. And remind you there's work still to do.


The stage-door guy with the cough will show you out.

News from the front, back and sides

Image via Wikipedia

My hair is getting totally out of control.

There's not much else happening in my life. Nothing that I can post about, at any rate.

Skies without a face

I’ve posted all my cloud pictures to a web album. You may have seen some of them already. If so, skip over those ones.

Here’s a sample:

Memiary

Memiary is what happens to a To-Do list when you've To-Done the stuff you had To-Do. It's a brilliant idea: you fill in up to five things you did today, and it's saved for posterity. I don't know about you, but my days are rarely filled with momentous events. But I do, on the other hand, often find myself wondering, when did I send that form off? Did I call that person already or do I still need to? So a searchable database of all the things I've done is a great thing, IMO.

Here's what I did on Saturday, if we're checking:

1.	Updated the website edit
2.	Bought some earrings edit
3.	Dropped into Churchill's edit
4.
5.

What a life I lead, eh? Couldn't even make it to four items, let alone five. Still, it's a lot to remember, or it was.

Eyes without a face

The result of shooting yourself in a dark room with only a desk-lamp and a Sherlock Holmes magnifying glass to direct the light.

Joni Mitchell - Both Sides Now 2000 live

And this is the version from 2000. See if you can spot the difference.